Big Bucks

Sigh. I just couldn't bear to move Clive down on the page. But I have to post sooner or later.

Said to me when I admitted I've written a novel: "I've always wanted to write a novel, but I don't have the money."

So, what do I say? Do I tell him my startup was $6 in some binder paper and a mechanical pencil? That I invested in a spiral notebook? That I print all my stuff off at work? (Oops, now I have to kill you.)

In this case, I let him keep his little dream - that, but for money, he would be the Next Great Novelist. That really he had it in him, but The World conspired to Keep Him Down.

Also said to me: "I tried to write a novel once, but I couldn't get past the first line." I didn't know what to say to that one either. I think my answer was, "hmm."

I imagine, once you're published, you hear this stuff all the time. Excuses, excuses, and self-deceptions. Being a writer tends to bring it out in people - it's a coveted profession for some reason, and everyone thinks they need an excuse not to be successful at it.

How about, "I never wrote a novel because I don't think I could do it."

It's what I'd say to an athlete, or a nurse, or a garbage man. It's honesty.

Then again, if the world were full of honesty, wouldn't writers run out of stuff to write about?