A Little Dignity

So I joined the PRO email group, and got over 100 emails in the first day. I guess I need to switch to Digest.

The first thing that popped into my inbox was a disheartening conversation in which writers worried and wrung thier hands about whether or not to name names when talking about agents. Dude, this is a Yahoo group - completely closed, with all applications screened by a moderator. Agents aren't allowed to join. Why we'd worry about saying names in a group where we're supposed to be networking and giving each other advice about getting published is mystifying to me.

If you don't know the breed, let me tell you that you've never seen anyone as terrified as a writer trying to get published. We jump at shadows and assume everyone is talking about us, writing lists, taking names on little notes that say "WENDY WRITER - DO NOT PUBLISH UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES." We're so desperately yearning for that one golden ring, publication, that we can get a little pathetic, like a guy who can't get a date and assumes all the popular girls are talking about him all the time. When the truth is, the popular girls barely know who he is.

Another discussion was about what to do - and I have to paraphrase here because this thought never crossed my mind - if a "publisher doesn't like semicolons." As in, when you go back through your manuscript to take out all the semicolons (which everyone assumes you'll do), do you use commas or brackets or what? And my first thought is, Why the fuck are you taking out all your semicolons?

I'm hardly a fearless person, and I guess being unpublished I really don't have anything (like a career or something) at stake. But I said in a previous post that every writer has her line in the sand, and I'd really have to say that semicolons is it. I can take it if I'm rejected over weak plot, thin characterizations, or flat writing. But if I've hit all these on the head, and the dealbreaker is my semicolons, well, I think ye'll have to go find yerself another writer. No one punctuates me. My semicolons are one of my writing tools, and I'll keep 'em, thanks.

(As an aside, I just can't help but think of some editorial staff on a Friday afternoon, saying "Hey - here's something. Let's see if she'll take out all the semicolons. Five bucks, you're on.")

You have to BS a bit on your way up, I guess, like with any business. You have to kowtow a bit, and you have to watch what you're saying. You have to use common sense. But I can't help but think that you don't really have to sell your soul. Do you have to shut up about your bad experiences? Do you have to refrain from warning others and giving advice? Do you have to let someone else do something so writerly-intimate as punctuate you?

The popular girls have a lot on their minds, and a lot of parties to go to. They vaguely remember you, but not well enough to hate you. You're just another guy asking for a date. If she says no, then maybe she's just not that into you, and it isn't something you said.

Just be you. What else can you do?